It's been a long time since I wrote a blog (a few weeks) but I finally have something to write about, so here we are. Actually I have a few things to write about so this may go off on a tangent or two, but I think they'll all tie in to the title above.
First off the main law of the universe that I believe I am totally dialed into is Murphy's Law. I know we all feel that way from time to time, but I can almost predict when Murphy will ring my bell. Case in point; after leaving Cisco Systems after just over 10 years of service I was given 90 days to sell any outstanding vested and unexercised stock options. After spending the last two and a half months watching it rise and fall on a daily basis (never rising more than 2 days in a row) I decided to finally sell it all and be done with it. Since my sale (after which it dropped one cent at the end of the trading day (my impact?) it has risen for 2 additional days nearly a whole dollar (2 day gain). Considering how many shares I sold it would have been a significant difference. Of course I anticipated that this would happen, but I also knew that it could only happen if I sold my shares. Had I not sold it would not have continued to rise, I am convinced of that.
Other grand examples of Murphy and me working together? When doing some kind, any kind of household fix the job will go well until the last screw which will either be frozen, or break, or the brute force necessary to get it to do what I want and need it to do – will ultimately break something else. Another one. If there is an unattended glass of liquid near me, it will spill. No, I am not clumsy and often times I will not spill it. Through the cosmic powers of Murphy a series of events will be strung together to spill the glass. This is especially true if there is a check for a large sum made out to me within range of the said glass of liquid. More? If I go to the store looking for something particular, this could be jeans in my size or large marshmallows, or a spice…the store will be out of that thing and just that thing. My favorite of course is when I am really looking forward to an activity or event and then just on the eve of – something happens to ruin it, or reschedule it, or cancel it. Best example of that one –I set up an elaborate plan to take my wife to Vegas a few years ago to go see Celine Dion and the night before we left I got an email saying that she had bronchitis and was canceling the show. Of course this impacted a lot of other people too (I guess).
So how does one work with such an albatross? You expect it, you anticipate Murphy's move and counter with either quiet and contemplative reflection or you stack the deck as much in your own favor as possible. Patiently find the stubborn screw and deal with that first, resign yourself to going to two different stores, make sure you have alternative plans to use other spices or find other events to attend.
Actually, the key word in all of this is actually 'patience' chances are that when one rushes anything it screws it up. There are exceptions, like getting your children out of the house and into the car. That is simple enough to not have too adverse an impact if something goes wrong, but if you are really rushing you will forget something. (Remember the film Home Alone? No, we have not yet forgotten one of our kids anywhere…yet.)
Okay, so that's Murphy for you. I would love to hear from others who have grand stories of working with this particular Law of the universe. The next one is Karma.
As many people who know me can attest I have my opinions about things and many of those are strong opinions. I like to think that I have a good sense of knowing what I know and admitting to what I don't know. And most of all I like to think that I am not so zealous in my opinions and feelings about things that I can't change my mind about something. In fact I think I am one of the few people I know who is open-minded enough to admit when he's come into information or been convinced by a coherent argument to change his mind. I find very few people do that. Don't misunderstand though, I don't characterize myself as a flip-flopper, just someone who can hear an argument, process it and weigh it with being blinded by my own previously held position. I do stand my ground on the things that I know that I know. How does this speak to Karma?
Karma is, for all intents and purposes to the lay-person is the belief that "what goes around comes around" but you knew that. What I think we all want to expect is that the one good turn we do for others will come back in the same way to us. This is in fact mostly a fallacy (in my humble opinion) as it would depend on people and human behavior having some equivalency among different people. In tight knit communities built on these principles it works (Amish people all pitch in to build each other's barns – it must be true cause I saw it in a movie). But in larger communities where we are connected to each other by fewer and fewer things, it is not that easy.
Karma is also the best 21st century way of calling on what is believe to be "The Golden Rule" "Do unto others, etc. "However, and this is one of my favorite parts of religious philosophy, it was actually Hillel, a Rabbi who was around maybe about the same time as Jesus, who said, "do NOT do unto others, as you would NOT want done unto you." I have a really good friend who used to fix my car every time it broke down (when I was not driving newer cars) No matter where or when I broke down Scott would come to the rescue. I could never legitimately return the same favor to Scott since I do not know jack about cars. In other words I cannot "do unto him" as I need "done unto me". However, I can treat him as a friend and find another way to help him so that I can repay his kindness and generosity. I have given him job advice, I have set him up with women, I have taken him to dinner, etc. It is in these ways that I have the skills and abilities to give back to Scott.
What I am driving at here I guess is a variation on "pay it forward". Call it "reimburse it forward" and it'll work like this:
Think of the people that have helped you in the past, the people that have been there for you, fixed things for you, done things for you, and figure out a way to give them something back using your skills and abilities, expertise, and generosity.
At the same time – think of a way that you might help someone out using your specific skills and abilities, expertise, and generosity.
Finally – forget all about the altruism of the act, that's nice, but see if you can let the person or people you are helping know why you are doing it and what you expect of them.*
*We seem to think that either we can't have expectations of other people or that it is rude or inappropriate to let people know that there is something expected of them. You would not neglect that duty when teaching a child so don't neglect it when dealing with your friends and neighbors. Let them know that you have expectations of them because they are allowed to have expectations of you and to let you know what they are. (I know my neighbor expects me to put plants in the dirt in front of my house now that he's fixed my sprinklers for me – he didn't say it, but I know it. If he had said it then I would know that I can go to him for something else at some point, that it is okay to have expectations of other people – and that is my own personal Law of the Universe.
Another favorite philosophy of mine, and I will end this blog entry with this, is the idea that "if you save one life it is as if you have saved the universe". What that means, for the uninitiated, is that each person lives in their own reality, has their own universe. If you can have a positive impact on them then you have impacted their reality, their entire sphere of influence, essentially their entire universe. And it is not that hard to do.
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